Always the Same
by PsychoDirector
Summary: In the tiny, twisted town she lives in, everything is always the same, every day, and she is happy. That is, until she meets the new boy. Suddenly change doesn't seem like such a bad thing. Suddenly it seems... cute. CRACK PAIRING AND FLUFF.


**__**

Brought on by a mixture of boredom, Writer's Block (GASP!), and the usual insomnia, I have for you... a one-shot. In this one-shot there lies a crack pairing, brought upon for no apparent reason and on little to no evidence. This, this humble crack, was first initiated into my mind via a tried and tested process... art. It was just a simple doodle of Raz, and the Road Crew Warriors (sounds a lot better than 'workers', don't cha' think?), and a Rainbow Squirt. In it, Raz and the Squirt were looking at each other and chatting like friends, whilst the Road Crew Warrior was eyeing them with SUSPICION.

**_This one-shot contains hints of the usual, canon pairings, as well as my own, selective crack. If you squint, you may be able to find some Raz/Lili, maybe some Den Mother/Milkman (don't ask...), and G-MEN/G-MEN! 8D No, just kidding about that last one. Seriously. Stop it. _**

**_It's rated E for everyone, and is a short tale about how things don't have to be always the same, even in a place like Boyd's mind. (Yes, it is based off of some of the crack from FluffleNeChakra's Love Works in Weird Ways. In fact, I even made a request for this pairing in the story, but then decided to just get off my lazy bum and write the tale myself.)_**

**_Now, here is your crack._**

* * *

In the twisted town, everything is always the same, and everyone knows that. Every day the G-Men pretend to be sewer workers, or grieving widows, or assassins, waving their equipment improperly. Every day Mother bustles around from dawn till dusk, moving a thing here, a doo-dad there, keeping the Milkman safe while at the same time running the daily classes the girls must attend. Every day a new girl or two is sent out to monitor the outside of the town, making absolutely sure that no one knows about the Milkman's location, and that those who come close are given one of the 'special boxes', just like they were taught.

The home schooling is strict, but far from cruel. The Squirts eat well and play with each other, behaving just like normal girls, more like a_ lot_ of twins than… whatever it is that sets them apart from normalcy. Growing up in such a structured and regular environment, always the same, many of the Squirts are unaware that they are in any way abnormal, and those who do keep it to themselves. They always keep to themselves, speaking freely only when safe at home for fear that something should slip about the Milkman. None of them know what would happen if they were to tell their big secret. A few have let cryptic hints slip, out of pure curiosity (they were little, after all). Very soon afterwards, another, new Squirt appears to hand the G-Man hinted to a special box, and the first is never seen again. It works wonders to keep the secret.

As for the rest of the girls? Why, they look forward to the day they will be chosen to explore the streets with all the excitement they can muster, chattering about their special day happily to the others. The inside of the house got awfully boring, after all, day after day, always the same. They practice super hard for the day, meticulously memorizing sales pitches and evade maneuvers for when customers got too curious.

Now today is her day, her _special _day, and she's determined not to mess up. She's worked as hard as she possibly could, excelling her peers in charisma and desire to prevent and dissuade anyone's knowledge of the Milkman. Mother is ever so proud of her, she can tell, always calling her by cutesy nicknames and offering her delicious treats under the table with a wink. It's only natural that she's chosen to prowl the streets on this day, and she hides her intense glee behind a determined salute and a fierce glare to show what happens when someone threatens _her_ job.

"Be careful," are the last words Mother tells her as she walks out the door and makes her way towards the telephone pole, "that boy knows too much. I think he might need a box of cookies to distract him. I know you'll do well, sweetie." Then she blows her a kiss, and then she's back inside, shooing a curious girl away from the open door.

_Boy? _She thinks, but pushes it out of her mind to recite the pledge one last time before heading off. She wasn't allowed to think of the outsiders as individuals, and wondering about one could lead to that, which was bad. Instead, she keeps her mind off it by concentrating on gliding across the power line, humming the pledge as she surfs. It's a tuneless little melody, but it's the only one she knows, and she just changes it as she hums.

Soon enough, she crosses over to the other side, jumping down neatly from the pole. Immediately, sirens go off in her ears, and the Phone Repairman walks up to her, ever reprimanding.

"Stop," he orders, unaware of what she's holding now. "This is a restricted area. Only phone company employees may ap—" Quickly, she flings the box at him and runs, narrowly escaping the resulting boom. Soon enough, the Phone Repairer is gone, and by the time another regenerates, she's walking the streets contentedly.

The next hour passes by slowly, full of scrupulous examination of the various G-Men, verifying that they're just as clueless as ever, always the same, always the same. The Grieving Widows are still golfing with their flowers, the Hedge Trimmer is trying to eat his blades, the Sewer Workers are playing air trumpet, _et cetera_. All of the G-Men check out on her mental list, and she is relieved, as she doesn't have another box of special cookies, not to have Mother hear that.

Soon enough, all she has left is to check on the Road Crew Workers, and then she's free to relax until sunset. This pleases her; she loves just sitting on one of the house's porches, watching the G-Man continue about their jobs in a way that was always the same, but nevertheless pleasing to the eye. And, she notes, if she gets bored, they're always fun to tease. Soon she can relax, but first…

"Hello, fellow road crew worker. Welcome to the road crew," a Road Crew Worker suddenly interrupts her thoughts and sends her looking towards the distance, curious. She'd never heard one of the G-Men say something like that before, and the change had her a little worried. Change wasn't planned for in her schooling, and she wasn't good at improv, not at all.

Then she sees him, and her heart seems to speed up. For some reason, he can pass through the fields of G-Men without getting in trouble, and seems to even be smiling and waving at them. This is most odd, especially so as considering he is otherwise as not 'always the same' as it is possible to be. In a way, he resembles her and her sisters in his stature, but there's… something… about him that makes her think instantly of the mysterious man that always stays hidden in his house; Boyd. This is also odd, as he in no way resembles Boyd, but he still has this sort of _aura_ that is similar to Boyd in a way she can't possibly explain.

He's different, and she likes that. In some way that she has no idea how to put into words, she likes him. Still, that doesn't change the fact that he's coming towards her, and she has a job to do. So, clearing her throat quietly behind her hand, she addresses him with stark indifference.

"Hello, _sir_," she begins, unintentionally accenting the 'sir' to say that she doesn't know him. "Would you like to try a box of my delicious Rainbow Treats?" This is a good start, keeping the conversation strictly impersonal and business-like. However, the new boy surprises her.

"I would love to, but I don't have any _milk_. Do you know where I can find some _milk_ for my _cookies_?" he asks, his contented voice straining in just the right places to send his own hint; he _knows_. This isn't like the G-Men guessing blindly about the Milkman—this was him _knowing_ and, almost as importantly, knowing that she knows something. Mother's classes have never prepared her for this and, embarrassingly, she panics.

"_AAH_! _Creepy man_!" she yelps, making him jump and a few G-Men swivel their heads suspiciously in her direction. Her first instinct is to run right then and there, the adrenaline still pouring through her veins, but she doesn't. She knows that, if she runs now, she might not see this new person again, and that is even scarier than his knowledge of the Milkman. So, when he holds up two gloved hands and begins walking away slowly, she can't resist following him. She doesn't want him to go away. She doesn't _want_ things to be always the same. He is different. He is good. He is… well, he's cute.

They continue that way for some time, him walking along rather nervously, her toddling along behind him on her old skates that she never seems to outgrow. In fact, they make it all the way to where the Sewer Workers are sword-fighting with each other with their plungers before he finally notices her. Actually, it's more like he acknowledges her being there, as it's quite possible that he already knew.

"Why are you following me?" he finally asks, far too blunt for her to find a subtlety to hide in. She has no chance to back out at that statement, without maybe inducing a chase scene, unless she answers him. And, as much as the idea of him chasing her for a change instead of the other way around makes her giggle, she feels obliged to answer. The problem is, however, she doesn't know how quite to go about answering.

"…Me?" she asks, stalling for time while she searching for an answer that isn't totally ridiculous. He nods, crossing his arms in a way that's very, very cute. She paws through her mind frantically, struggling to hold in her panic as she does so. At her awkward silence, he steps closer, and her heart speeds up appropriately.

"Look, I'm not interested in cookies, really. I just want to find what I'm looking for so he can open a gate I need to get in. Sorry, but I'm really not hungry, and I spent the last of my money on Dream Fluffs." She shakes her head, a contradict to his nodding, and takes another step closer.

"It's not about the cookies, sir," she announces slowly, still in thought.

"Raz. My name's Raz," he corrects. It's a pretty name. Very pretty, actually. "What's it about, then?" She thinks a little more, then hits upon an idea. She smiles slightly, meeting his eye with a nervous giggle.

"You, silly." Then, before he can say another word, and before her mind can tell her that this is _so, so wrong_, she quickly leans over and pecks him on the cheek. It's nothing special; just a quick contact between Berrylicious lip gloss-coated lips and now-decidedly-pink skin. Still, it causes them both to blush severely and stare at everything but each other. Then, as her logic catches up with her new, giggly and bubbly self, she starts skating off before she can make a further fool of herself.

Then it's just Raz, standing by himself in the middle of the street, red-faced, with three G-Man analyzing him as long as he has his back turned. Slowly, he brings a hand up to the kissed cheek, pressing two fingers to the warm space. He can still hear the Rainbow Squirt giggling as she makes her way over to some other part of the mind, but he's still. Finally, he shakes his head quickly, as if shaking off water, then laughs to himself nervously.

"It's just a mental figment, Raz, get a grip. Just a _mental figment_." He starts walking in the opposite direction, returning to his search for the Milkman. "The sooner I find Lili, the better… I'm getting nervous around Boyd's imagination. Jeez." Still, he can't help but add, under his breath, "Why does that guy have such a cute imagination…?"

The next day, while collecting up toys and such from the floor of the house, the Den Mother finds a drawn-upon sheet of paper. Curious, she flips it over and looks at it, only to see the word 'Raz' colored on it in shades of red and pink, and covered in multi-colored hearts like a valentine. She walks into the kitchen, still looking at the paper, then holds it up for the girls to see.

"Girls, did one of you… draw this…?" she asks them. They all look up briefly from their play, and a chorus of denials echoes through the room. Eventually, she shrugs and puts the piece with the other drawings, always the same.

Always the same.

* * *

_The end. 8D_


End file.
